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Blogs > sweetyguy32000 > sweetyguy's world

a bit of christmas science  

sweetyguy32000 59M
2 posts
12/25/2009 10:12 am

Last Read:
12/25/2009 7:42 pm
a bit of christmas science
there are approximately two billion (persons under 1 in the world. however, since santa does not visit of the muslim, hindu, jewish, or buddist (except maybe in japan) religions, this reduces the workload for christmas night to 15% of the total (or 378 million according to the population reference bureau). at an average (census) rate of 3.5 per household, that comes to 108 million homes, persuming there is at least one good in each.
santa has about 31 hours of christmas to work with, thanks to the diffrent time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (witch seems logical).
this works out to 967.7 visits per second. this is to say that for each christan household with a good , santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for hin, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get onto the next house.
assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (witch, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the porposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles,not counting bathroom stops or breaks.
this means santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second - 3000 times the speed of sound. for porposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the ulysses space probe, moves at a pokey 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.
the payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. assuming that each gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting santa himself. on land a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. even granting that the "flying" reindeer can pull 10 that normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them - santa would need 360,000 of them. this increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the queen elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).
600,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance - this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. the lead pair of reindeer would adsorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. in short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. the entire reindeer team would be vaporised within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time santa reached the fifth house on his trip.
not that it matters, however, since santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to acceleation forces of 17,000 g's. a 250-pound santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.

therefore, even if santa did exist, he's dead now.

unless, of course he's magic.

merry christmas

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