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Welcum to the Mosh pit! While in The Pit, you will hear the metal that pumps thru my veins, it permeates this blog and is all around you. Ear plugs are provided if you choose not to hear, but I hope you will listen for the music IS the essence of me. This blog is based on my opinion and does not necessarily reflect the opinion of anyone else in this universe or any other. And I have an opinion about EVERYTHING. If you don't like it, that's too damn bad. If you do appreciate my words and my music, thank you. Feel free to leave your two cents, it is always appreciated, in my opinion! My current favorite songs:Paralyzer by Finger ElevenRock and Roll by Sebastian BachBlack #1 by Type O Negative Lie by Savage JackLove Kills by the Vinny Vincent InvasionBrutal Pla net by Alice CooperReleasing The Demons by GodsmackThe following posts were made during the scariest time of my life. I'm still terrified but thanks to God and alot of love from everyone here in Blogland, all is well and will remain so, Thanks SO MUCH to everyone!!! I LOVE YOU PEOPLE!!! PLEASE PRAY FOR MY LITTLE BOY The Second MRI was GOOD newsUPDATE The results of the second opinion
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A Fart is a Fart, no matter how sweet it may be!
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Posted:Feb 27, 2008 6:51 am
Last Updated:Mar 2, 2008 3:04 pm
10240 Views
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A big thanks to bubbarigine for making me laugh my gas off...I mean, ASS off with his post!
[post 1288793]
It hit very close to home for me because my man was recently named Fartologist of the Year! He was the first ever recipient of the Golden Clothes Pin award! 
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UPDATE: The results of the second opinion
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Posted:Feb 12, 2008 8:05 am
Last Updated:Jul 16, 2009 7:10 am
18960 Views
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Last week we took Lil' Metal to Strong Hospital in Rochester for a second opinion. The head of the Pediatric Neurosurgery told us that he pretty much agreed with the opinion of Upstate Medical Center.
HOWEVER, he told us that there is a significant chance that the tumor will bleed again, there is just no way of knowing how much or when. 
He told us the same thing, to go home and monitor him for symptoms and pray for the best.
I don't know what else to say right now. I'm rattled over this but I'm trying to deal. I think I'm doing okay for the most part. I've been put on Paxil and all suicidal thoughts are about gone. I'm not the most religious person on Earth but I don't want to take the chance that I really will burn in Hell for eternity if I do something stupid. If there is an afterlife I want to spend it with my loved ones 
A note to my friend who is leaving Blogland:
Sorry I haven't been around here much, I know you understand why. You will be hearing from me soon. Take care!!!!
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Do me a favor????
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Posted:Jan 29, 2008 6:06 pm
Last Updated:Apr 8, 2008 4:25 pm
11068 Views
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Sorceror07 has a cool new toy that I'm dying for him to blog about!
Won't you drop by his last post which was posted last year and encourage him to show off his new big black toy? 
(We gotta get this guy blogging again!) 
Thank you and have a nice day! 
Here is his last post:
[post 1204369]
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A Third MRI is about to happen, thankfully!
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Posted:Jan 28, 2008 9:16 am
Last Updated:Feb 5, 2008 7:11 am
11231 Views
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This Thursday my Lil' Metalhead, my awesome ex and I will be heading to Rochester for a second 2nd opinion.
I'm very happy about this. I will feel sooooo much better when this top rated Pediatric Neurosurgeon looks us in the eye and tells us that Lil' Metal will out live us all!
~~keep those fingers crossed~~
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No, I most certainly do NOT feel guilty.
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Posted:Jan 26, 2008 12:09 pm
Last Updated:Mar 10, 2008 6:23 am
10764 Views
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The Story of XXX(The very short version for the new readers of my blog)
OK...it didn't turn out so short!
XXX is a woman I met a little over a year ago. At first I liked her very much, she was nice, outgoing, fun to hang with, spontaneous and funny.
She lived about an hour away from me and worked what seemed like all the time so our schedules rarely allowed us to get together. On the rare occasion we managed to get together we talked, drank, got high, drank and talked. It was fun. I was going thru a hard time and needed the break.
We got together about 5 times before we had sex. The sex was okay, not at all mind blowing and I did not smile for days on end like I did after being with NaughtyBlonde78.
(For the new readers, NB78 is a wonderful, sweet ultra SEXY woman from this site that I had my first bisexual experience with) 
Prior to having sex with XXX I had begun to notice that 9 times out of 10 our conversations focused on her life and experiences. To my own credit, I've been told that I'm a good listener and easy to talk to, so maybe that is how it worked out that way. HOWEVER, a major pet peeve of mine is when someone only talks about themselves in conversation. Friendship is supposed to be a two way street. I do not open up easily (at all) but really felt comfortable enough to do so with XXX. So ONE time we openly talked about my stuff, after that it was all her. But I let it slide to see if it would even out.
But you know what???? Since Dec 6th when my went to the hospital, she NEVER ONCE asked about him. She IM'd me on Jan 4th to tell me it was her birthday and she wanted to get together. And about 15 minutes after that IM'd again to ask how he was and didn't even know his name!!!
During our conversations she confided in me about her sexual experiences, which were MANY. She was picking up total strangers in bars when she went out of town for work and she worked alot. At first I thought nothing of it. Then I realized that she did not know these men!!! She did not know if they had diseases. I did not know if she used protection or not but I have to assume she didn't. So, in essence I was by default sleeping with all these strangers too if I had sex with her again. I'm NO prude, trust me, but it made me sick to my stomach!
XXX is the text messaging queen and I just don't text. I point blank from day one told her that. I also explained to her that I do not have texting on my phone and it cost me every time she sent me a text. I asked her not to do it and she agreed not to text me. And then kept right on doing it!!! So I let it slide, it was not like she was doing it every single day. I asked her not to text me 3 times altogether but it kept happening. And it happened at absolutely ridiculous times, such as 6 AM on a Saturday morning when "normal" people are sleeping.
I finally decided that I could no longer be in a friendship that was a one way street. And I could not risk being in a sexual relationship with a woman who was carrying on like she was. I decided to wait to call her on her day off so we could speak about it over the phone.
Then I got the worst case of Strep Throat that I ever had in my life. So the call got postponed. Then she text messaged me that Saturday morning at 6 AM when I was sick as a to ask me a question that could have waited a few hours. She KNEW I was very sick too, I had told her that the day before.
That text was the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back! I texted her back:
"The answer to your question is no, I am trying to fucking sleep, do not ever text me again and lose my number too."
She texted me right back that she was sorry. I did not care and ignored it.
I just checked my IM (another thing that I rarely do) and there was a message on there from XXX saying that she could not believe my attitude, she hopes my life gets better, she would never speak to someone the way I did to her...yada yada yada, with this very holier than thou tone. I did not waste my time with a response.
I may have come off as a harsh bitch but I do NOT give a flying squirrel's black ass about how I came across!!! She needed the wake up call as far as I'm concerned.
I do not feel guilty.
So...
I am now taking applications for a new female FWB!!
My only requirements are that you are fairly close to my location, clean, caring, honest, respectful, understanding and not a text messaging addict! 
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Tonight, he cums!!!!
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Posted:Jan 24, 2008 8:52 am
Last Updated:Jan 29, 2008 5:47 pm
10907 Views
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sorceror07 has been in southern Maryland for the past 10 days working. I have enjoyed the alone time more than I thought I would but have missed him like crazy too. He is on his way home to me right now and I'm sooooo happy!!! 
Boy, do I have plans for him!!!
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Reality TV
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Posted:Jan 21, 2008 5:23 pm
Last Updated:Jan 28, 2008 9:09 am
10676 Views
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DocDirk is just going to love me now!
I've been tuning in to (so-called) Reality TV lately. And I've been tuning in ALOT!
Here is the list of shows I am watching or have watched:
Super Group (can anyone guess why?)
Rock of Love with Bret Michaels
Gene Simmons Family Jewels
The Bad Girls Club
Sunset Tan
The Rock Life
LA Ink
Miami Ink
Celebrity Rehab
Snoop Dogg's Father Hood
Run's House
The Surreal Life
Ted Nugent's show (can't remember the name)
The Anna Nicole show
The Simple Life
My Fair Brady
Scott Baio is 45 & a moron
I Love NY
Flava Flav's show (can't remember the name)
Celebrity Fit Club
American Chopper
American Idol (I was stoned or some such excuse)
Survivor
Breaking Bonaduche
Nick & Jessica: Newlyweds
Those are the ones I can remember and I'm sure there is more. In my own defense I have read at least one book for every show I've watched. Besides, I only found about half of them really interesting.
I have found that these shows are a wonderful form of mindless entertainment when your brain is about to explode from too much stress. All I have to do is put on one of these shows and I can literally feel the brain cells melting like a snowman in July.
And for me lately, not having brain capacity enough to think is a much needed and refreshing change.
I must go now....
Bret is waiting!
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Time for a THIRD MRI.....
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Posted:Jan 18, 2008 6:03 am
Last Updated:Feb 5, 2008 7:12 am
10997 Views
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My Lil' Metalhead's Pediatrician has suggested a third MRI by someone other than Upstate Medical in Syracuse. She wants us to go out to Rochester to Strong Hospital where they have a state of the art Pediatric Neurosurgery unit.
My ex is not too pleased about the idea. He feels like it could be dangerous to have 3 MRIs in a little over a month. Plus it is a four hour drive for us to get out there. I'm all for the third MRI. I think if it were dangerous they would not let it happen. They do this stuff every day and they know what they are doing. And I don't care how long the damn drive is!!! I would drive him to China if that's where we needed to go. My ex is talking to the Pediatrician today and I'm hoping she will explain the importance of it to him the same way she explained it to me. I have confidence that in the end my ex will do the right thing, he is a great guy. A bit THICK headed but still a great guy. And a WONDERFUL father.
So hopefully this will happen soon. And when we get the results, the good news (because it HAS to be good news) will allow me to finally relax a little and then maybe I'll stop having so many damn panic attacks. Some quality sleep would sure be nice too!
~~Keep your fingers crossed~~
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Lazy is as lazy does...
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Posted:Jan 15, 2008 6:54 pm
Last Updated:Jan 17, 2008 2:37 pm
10203 Views
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And I'm doing nothing.
I did re-arrange the living room & the dining room all by myself today. Moving a treadmill that weighs more than I do and is taller than me was interesting! But other than that I am too lazy to move. Or type. I wish I had enough energy to kick some serious ass on someone who seriously needs it,
BUT,
I suppose I should conserve my energy for
sorceror07
At least he DESERVES my energy
Unlike those who strive to bring me down.
They only deserve my pity.
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How sweet is my man???
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Posted:Jan 13, 2008 5:09 pm
Last Updated:Jan 25, 2008 10:37 am
10290 Views
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Today is our anniversary 
It's been two years since we met in person
Last year, he bought me two dozen roses, two pounds of chocolates and a two foot teddy bear
For extra bonus points, let's see who remembers the bear's name, I nicknamed him The World's First Heavy Metal Teddy Bear, but what was his REAL name? 
Well, for our anniversary this year,
sorceror07 flew us in a gourmet dinner all the way from South Beach, Miami!!!
From one of his favorite restaurants, Joe's Stone Crab
We had Manhattan Clam Chowder, Joe's world famous coleslaw, creamed spinach, tons of stone crab claws, all topped off with real Key Lime Pie
How lucky am I????
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To link to this blog (rm_metalmama69) use [blog rm_metalmama69] in your messages.
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